Yesterday, I looked out on our deck. There's this little yellow canary on the floor of the deck and he's just sitting there and I thought "That's odd". Sometimes they'll come and perch and fly away and it just sat there and sat there so I was trying to interpret that and then I looked at my window and there was this little circle of little tiny yellow feathers stuck on the window. Well, obviously, it was flying along and "boink" and it hit the window. It was kind of stunned. It didn't kill it but it was like stunned like just sitting there.
So I'm thinking of this yellow canary - and why is it not flying away - and I saw the rest of the picture. It had run in a head on collision with my window. Though many times they probably die he was just stunned. He probably had quite a headache after that. But he soon flew away. How many times are we just flying along and things as we know them come to an abrupt stop.
We lose our job. A health concern comes - I think of my husband and three years ago in June when he was diagnosed with cancer and it was like someone put a grenade in my lap and it went off. I even checked for the Big Dipper about two o'clock in the morning and it was still there so I thought O.K. things are still in motion here. Even our great ideas that don't work, our relationships - either they're falling apart or God's asking us "No, you stick it out". We argue, we blame, we wrestle, we question, we throw a fit and our God is big enough to handle all these but ultimately He will ask us to surrender. Let go of that white knuckle hold of control and fall into His arms of grace.
With white it represents also purity. We don't come to Him white. We come to Him soiled and sinful and He cleanses us and then we are white. White can also represent the Holy Spirit. I'm just so appreciative of His hovering presence over us as He enables us to surrender. And then as we surrender in the midst of the storm then comes that little waft of His song - a song of the Spirit - the comfort of His Spirit - and the strategies of our Abba Father. And once again we're safe and find our refuge, our high tower, our unchanging peace. Our God who never leaves us or forsakes us.
So I just pray that even as I was worshiping in the back, I just kept waving this white flag as a symbol of Him enabling us to surrender. It's a good place in the arms of grace of our Father. So I just symbolically just pray that surrender to Him.
James 4: We have not because we ask not. You can paraphrase that - we have not because we don't surrender it - because we just keep hanging on to it.